There is some type of relief in knowing that I will never be a perfect person.
I don’t even strive for perfection (anymore). As I know this is the first factor in an escalator called, defeat. This morning I did a weigh in, and I haven’t lost any more weight this week. And at first, I was bummed, but then I remembered to count my blessings instead…instead of going and stuffing my face full of brownies and drowning in self misery. Instead, I did the opposite. I had a bottle of water instead of a third cup of coffee. In counting my blessings, I realized many things that were good, not perfect and in that way I was more than grateful and very satisfied in how far I have come in just one year of life.
Today it finally happened—the harvest.
Well, a mini harvest happened. But today, my five year old did everything he was supposed to do to “get ready for the day” without me having to HOUND him. He was then allowed to play his video games until we are about to leave for an appointment. But finally, the discipline paid off from yesterday and today we enjoyed a morning full of peace and serenity. And I am grateful for that.
I see my psychiatrist today. And every time (for reasons beyond me), that I see him I get anxious. I am on medication for anxiety. Oh, the irony, but anyways I am excited today when I look at the positives to get “weighed in.” I will have lost weight and I know for a fact it will be taken with good heed. I remember when I was pregnant not wanting to even go to the doctor appointments because I had continuously gained so much weight.
“What are you eating?” he asked me while I sat fatly draped on the so called, “bed” in the doctor’s office.
“Cereal.” I remember saying…
But either way all of that sugary cereal topped with my swollen figure did not make for an optimal ride. In fact, my pregnancy was pure misery with the sickness and weight gain…gain that I’m finally about to rip off of me like a bandaid. You just wait and see. 15 plus pounds down on this new transformation and even though I didn’t lose weight this week, I FEEL good. To strive for perfection is a losing battle and one I have lost before, many times over. But to simply thank God for feeling GOOD every day is a miracle and one that is something that I call a blessing. It starts the chain of events, from how we feel to what we do with those feelings that leads us down the narrow path to optimal health. Good choices create good habits and soon enough you find yourself going for the bottle of water instead of the coffee. Mainly because you realize…you don’t need it anymore. And Amen to that!
I pray you have a good day and even though you may feel anxious at times, that you know that God is there for you even in the midst of strain. Use faith when you can’t see how problems will be solved and you will reap that harvest that is about to come. Amen.
“For the time being no discipline brings joy, but seems grievous and painful; but afterwards it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” Hebrews 12:11