Party Gatherings.

Have you ever been sick for a week and when you finally do wake up you feel like your life is in disarray?

This just happened to me.

I never thought I did that much around here, but after this week of being down with some ear/sinus issues, I’m waking up and seeing laundry—everywhere, and dishes—everywhere. Everything is everywhere and no one is to be found cleaning. Looking at it from the bright side though, I guess I DO DO things around here and—everywhere.

Last weekend we had a great party gathering that included my closest family. We try to do this every year around Valentine’s Day but the past few years we failed to get together; and that just made this visit even more sweet. And sweets there were too! My aunt made a lovely puff cream cake and we had cookies, and mini muffins and pizza galore. My mom brought a cheese and fruit plate that was out of this world!

I ordered out just to save myself the stress (the pizza) of feeding everyone and it made it all that much more enjoyable when socializing. We even ordered a pizza called a, “Pittsburgh Pizza” full with steak and French fries on it. It was fun food for sure.

Don’t you love Party Gatherings?

You know I do. I love get togethers or times in which we can really all celebrate life together. I think it’s what makes life rich. Do you have Party Gatherings?

Today, as I try my best to regroup I am reminded of simple days like these and also ones in which we can come together, laugh, and simply enjoy life on its terms. That’s a good party. A good life. And I thank God for it each and every day. I also thank him for the sweet moments that allow me on days like this (when ill), to reflect on what’s past and get excited for future memories that have yet to even happen yet. Life is a party. And Amen to that!

“They brought to Him all who were ill…and he healed them.” Matthew 4:24

party gatherimgs

Big & Fuzzy.

Have you ever left the hair salon with a swanky new haircut only to get home and not know how to style it?

I think this happened to me this week.

And this is only because yesterday my husband referred to my hair as “big and fuzzy.” It occurred to me at this very exact point that I definitely wasn’t pulling it off. He wasn’t being critical, or nasty, but simply making an honest statement. But it made me nearly blush in thinking I was doing something “new and hip” to myself when in all actuality I was just trying to mimic my old ways of styling my hair and applying it to my new haircut.

Long story short, supposedly I need to learn how to use a “straight iron.” But that’s besides the point.

The whole thing got me thinking about change and how change if not reckoned with can cause “conflict.”

My big fuzzy hair used to maybe be something I adorned but with the changing times I refused to not conform and use everyone else’s straight ways. I chose to wave! And wave I have since the early 90s.

Either way, the way my hair looks isn’t ever going to be as good as how I feel inside. And for me, I’ve decided that even with this new haircut I will continue to style it the best way I can giving that right now I am (sometimes) going to look big and fuzzy. God wants me to be myself. And that is all that truly matters at the end of the day. And frizzy or not, I am loved by my family. And that truly is my biggest blessing. And Amen to that!

“And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the wind blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.” Matthew 7:25

be yourself.

Open Door Policy.

I could talk myself out of anything.

I guess I’m just one of those people who suffer from extreme anxiety; I don’t know.

But lately, it seems like it’s either gotten better or worse. Which one, I’m not sure, but I worry.

ABOUT EVERYTHING.

It’s part of my nature and what makes me—me. Medication or not, I am prone to worry. Maybe we all are, but I know at birth my worries began. It wasn’t until a year or so ago, that I began to deal with what surrounds my anxiety. So now, I see a counselor and have medication that I take daily. This aids me in the band-aids that I put on my worrisome nature, but all in all, God has helped me most in my troubles.

I had an appointment with my counselor today for 1:15 that I cancelled. I did it because I knew that it wasn’t the best thing for me right now. And that’s all I can say. Sometimes you just have to trust yourself and do what is best for you, not someone else.

All in all, I know I’m just another appointment in this woman’s book, but for me…today… “talking” isn’t something I was ready to do on MY agenda. Sometimes talking about worry only makes it more worrisome and discussing pieces of my past isn’t something that TODAY I was in need of doing. In fact, I knew it would be to my detriment.

I used to go to appointments and make arrangements based on my guilt factor. But not anymore. I do what is best for me and my family and with God’s help, I am able to live a healthy, fruitful, peaceful, and joyous life. He is the only one that makes it better for me, not anything else. With Him as my counselor, I am never pained. His open door policy is something I take full advantage of and regardless of what the world says, his pathways are always the ones I will choose to follow.

“Ask and it will be given to you, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you.” Matthew 7:7

open door policy

Lights.

My computer screen background has a big yellow daisy on it and the scripture: “…for with you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light.” Psalm 36:9 And as I sit here on my laptop in the dark, I am reminded of how much I am loved.

My husband just left for work and my five year old is still sleeping. Tyson, my big brown Boxer (who is now nearing ten years old), is now asleep downstairs on our old love sofa.

Can I just tell you? Life in these early moments is so grand; it definitely feels like love at first sight. In the dark. By myself. I don’t know…Either way it is some type of happiness I just can’t explain.

It’s Peaceful. Spiritual. Real life.

Tyson is getting old. But just like in real life, aren’t we all?? The only difference is that we get more time than dogs, otherwise maybe we would all be the same age. I don’t know but either way, this dog (sometimes) acts like he is truly ten.

He has always been prone to…what we might call “certain quirks.” (Like the time he became terrified of our water cooler). But lately he has developed a new schtick—and by that I mean he has become afraid of the dark.

I’m not kidding.

He gets stuck on our stairs every single morning (now) and night.

My husband and I barley have our heads hit the pillow at night before he starts this high pitched mermaid whine…it starts out ever so faintly and grows SLOWLY over time…until it’s like a fire alarm in need of new batteries. He is relentless.

And much like a ten year old.

If you go to the stairs and flip the light on— there he is. Just standing on the stairs waiting for you to turn on the light so he can go the rest of the way down…every night, just like clockwork, he literally gets stuck. Stuck on the stairs. So you have to turn the light on, reassure him it’s okay, and down he will go the rest of the way to the basement.

It got me thinking this morning about how lucky we are to have electricity. Honestly. How would you tell people your dog lives on the stairs?

Some mornings I’m happy just to fumble my way to the coffee machine in the dark without waking anyone up. But this morning it got me thinking…

I am loved. View it as you will, but looking at it all on a positive note, I am definitely: Needed.

Oh yes. And badly.

I have the power to turn the light on!

But truly, I am loved not only by God (who always keeps it light), but also those who surround me here on Earth. And there is NOTHING greater than that. That is, my truest blessing.

Thank you for today, O Lord, and please help us to remember that even in our darkest moments—You will love us and help us to keep it light. Amen. Lights.

New Beginnings.

Do you ever feel like the world is playing tricks on you?

And no…this isn’t me singing or serenading you with song lyrics right now.

Today. It is supposed to snow.

Big surprise, right?! I know.

But today. it’s different. And I’m not fooling you.

What they are calling for includes four inches of snow by one pm—one pm! And then freezing rain on top of that! The nerve.

Well, put me in a snow globe and call me Elsa! My nerves could make me vomit about it all…

All when my son has pre-K this morning too…I know, right?! I could go on and on. But long story short?

This morning…I got myself in a whirl wind before a drop of snow even hit the ground.

And it got me thinking…

Would Elsa do this?

Heck no! “…the cold never bothered her much anyway.” At least as far as I recall.

She had the faith of a queen and so should I. And in the end, when I stop myself and the whirling of my mind with “what ifs” I realize—it’s just SNOW. Nothing can hurt me in a situation where God is at the wheel and I’m his lovely passenger in a game called, Life.

Everyday is a chance for new beginnings, for living boldly and that means, even if the boldness is something small like driving out into the cold and doing what life has in store for us each and every day then so be it.

And thank you, Jesus for that! New beginnings. “Let it go,” Elsa would say. Start fresh.

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Romans 12:2  

new beginnings

Moon Morning.

I didn’t sleep well last night.

I tossed and turned and went between staring and watching my husband sleep and debating whether or not to color on my phone all night instead.

Somewhere around 2:30 am I fell asleep.

But it was just in time for my husband’s alarm to go off and wake him up for work.

“My husband wakes up early.”

I have said this line COUNTLESS times and have even made jokes about it over the years, but he does and today (photograph enclosed), I proved my point.

If you are waking up to the moon instead of the sun then you wake up early!

But it got me thinking…

Is all of this tossing and turning me worrying over things that GOD can simply take care of, not me?

It is true. And yes tomorrow night I will begin exercise before I go to sleep—and by that I mean exercising my own daily demons before allowing my head to hit the pillow. And Amen to that!

Lord please remind me to simply surrender instead of trying to do all things on my own. Amen.

“Make me know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths.” Psalm 25:4

moon morning

Hitting the Refresh Button.

The world is beautiful.

Guess what?

Yesterday my mom came and got my son for a sleep over!

YEAH! Party on….

My husband and I mostly slept but I can’t tell you—I can’t even begin to tell you how refreshed as a mom I feel right now. So, thank you mom.

I miss my son dearly. Even though it was only one night, but after the way I feel right now I know it was a much needed break.

Do you take breaks for yourself?

It got me thinking this morning how I need to be better at doing this.

Mom offered to take him this time, but next time I may just have to ask…because you know what>!? I NEEDED THE TIME.

The ME time.

I didn’t feel selfish in knowing he was having a blast with his G-Ma either. It was just some quiet time alone that gave me this jump start. So try it.

Call in the big guns.

The grandparents.

And be sure to take care of yourself first. It’s the greatest gift you can give others.

Today it is snowing again and I’m beginning to think that groundhog lied. However, the day is still beautiful. Because it is a fresh start. And Amen to that!

“Your lovingkindness, O Lord, extends to the heavens, your faithfulness reaches to the skies.” Psalm 36:5

life is beautiful

Fondue.

 

So, last night’s Valentine’s Day ended up including fondue…

My husband, as romantic as he is, brought home the necessary ingredients to make melted chocolate with bananas and strawberries for dipping.

It was unplanned and unexpected.

And it got me thinking this morning…

I woke up today very optimistic and full of hope. I have no idea why.

I have nothing big to announce and nothing much new to say…

Or do I?

If things happen unexpectedly and unplanned today, I need to meet them where they are and whole heatedly because most of the time, these things are what make life so great. They make life–life.

Somehow fondue is always unexpected. A definite happy accident.

It is very windy outside today and I’m told that dogs should hold on to the grass if you let them outside.

It’s a good thing our Tyson weighs so much! (As do we).

Until next time—party on.

“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who give to all generously.” James 1:5

 

fondue

 

The Real V-Day.

Last year on Valentine’s Day, I got in a fight with the Fed Ex man.

It wasn’t a fight per say, but I’m not one to ever offer official complaints on people and last year I did just that.

I was excited for the delivery of what I was going to give my husband for Valentine’s Day last year (even though now I can’t even remember what it was), and as soon as I heard the knock on the door I ran to grab the package…

Instead what I saw was the Fed Ex man (the one in the Ray Bans), driving away.

No package.

I was “undeliverable.”

And I was mad.

I actually called the warehouse. Mainly just to see if he could come back. But somehow?

I ended up filing a formal complaint…

Man, afterwards I felt awful and the next day tried to explain myself on my doorstep to this Ray Bans studded stranger. He was red faced but smiled.

I called the warehouse back and even apologized to them. He was just a boy. And this year? I’m nearly even more mortified that I did that than last year.

So, this year in taking strides and moving forward I realize:

I’ve come a LONG WAY baby.

If I had a pair of Ray Bans, I’d be putting them on right now.

This year, I got my husband a card and he got me a Snickers bar. And I DO remember that.

Love is love. I hope you have a good Valentine’s Day and don’t get caught up in the STUFF> you won’t remember it next year. At least I never do. Much love to you and yours.

“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.” Matthew 5:7

the real V-day

Relax.

I did something bold yesterday.

I shared my blog.

You may think this sounds silly, but to me it felt like I was sharing a post of me naked on Facebook.

It was pretty gutsy for me. I did it though because I knew eventually, I would share what I write…it’s what my calling is and what I’m meant to ultimately do.

Do you know what your calling is? 

I used to stumble through life trying different jobs thinking “my calling” was some type of position or degree, but that didn’t work. None of them did.

With God’s direction I began to realize that all I needed was Him and the rest would fall into place. It’s taken decades for me to realize this, but it was all because I wasn’t listening. I was going from one thing to the next and not looking “up.”

Don’t look straight forward. Or behind you. Look up.

And relax.

Today, more than ever I need to be reminded to relax and take one day at a time.

The consistency always pays off and the work of simply looking “up,” is always the way to go. It’s worth the weight in gold.

I hope you have a good day. It is lightly snowing here but the birds are still out there chirping for Spring. They don’t worry because they know God is good—and He is all the time! They look up!

“Stand firm in the Lord.” Philippians 4:1

relax